Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online Aug 10, 2021 & in the collection Photographic Memories: 7even— available here
Southport Rd 13 by Melodie Yvonne
Sometimes I just wanna sit with my train wreck by the light of my dumpster fire Sometimes even though I’m already high I just wannna get higher and higher Sometimes when I’ve just got too much to do I sit down and do nothing at all And I still just don’t know why the fuck I still wish that you’re dumb fucking ass would just call
Sometimes I just wanna go back to that trailer on the dark side of CSL Dig me a hole way down deep in that party bowl ‘til I forget that I fell But I just can’t give in ‘cause it never’d end and I’m aready goin’ to hell Fallin’ over and over right through the floor of my dirty back barn room well
Were you thinkin’ ‘bout me or just ‘bout yourself, would it’d changed anything if I’d tried Do you even regret for a second you left without ever saying goodbye Do you think ‘bout me or wonder if I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout you ‘Cause, baby, I still miss you so fucking much and this missin’ you’s givin’ me blues
Should I wait here for you ‘til the ends of the earth or just go right ahead & jump off Should I wallow in silence down deep in the ditches or scream out your name from the top Maybe you love me, but probably not and there’s just too much room left for doubt I should give all my hope to a fifth of Patron & just let it all work itself out
Are you thinkin’ ‘bout me or just ‘bout yourself, ‘cause I’m here about to get fucked Do you even regret for a second you left without even tryin’ to get sucked Do you think ‘bout me or wonder if I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout you ‘Cause baby I still miss you so fucking much and this missin’ you still gives me blues
When will I be done I just wanna have fun and burn everything I have left I guess I like torture ‘cause I don’t know why I just can’t fucking let me forget The sun and the moon just can’t love each other ’cause then I guess everything’d end But I’d rather it be over right fucking now than just have to sit here and pretend
Sometimes I just wanna sit with my train wreck by the light of my dumpster fire Sometimes even though I’m already high I just wannna get higher and higher Sometimes when I’ve just got too much to do I sit down and do nothing at all And I still just don’t know why the fuck I still wish that you’re dumb fucking ass would just call
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
It’s finally here. Signed preorders for Methlehem are live, and this time, everything’s running smoothly — no glitches, no stress 😅. Every copy will be personally signed before it ships, so you’ll get a piece of the story straight from me.
Preorders close Friday, Nov 14 at 11:59 PM (Indiana time). Check the product details for approximate shipping dates and more info.
Methlehem is raw. It’s real. It’s unflinching. It’s the messy, jagged heart of love, loss, addiction, and survival laid bare — straight from everybody’s favorite hometown. These aren’t easy stories, but they are honest ones.
Be among the first to hold a signed copy in your hands. Step into the chaos, and let Methlehem take you on the ride.
⚠️ Explicit Content Warning: Contains depictions of drug use, violence, and sexual content. Not suitable for readers under 18.
Originally published online April 29, 2021 & in the collection Photographic Memories: 7even— available here
Ambivalence by Melodie Yvonne
I don’t wanna die, but I don’t wanna live I’m so fucking tired I’ve got nothin’ to give I just want it over, just want it to end I’m breakin’ ’cause I got no room left to bend
I’m tired of pretendin’ ’bout all I got left When all that I am is a giant fucking mess I wanna go hide, but I wanna confess I wanna die, but God’s still playin’ chess
I want it to end, but don’t know how to quit Even though I just screw up & turn it to shit I wanna remember, but wanna forget I just wanna know what the fuck all this is
I wanna just lie down and blow my brain up But I’d just fucking miss and I’d fuck it all up I just wanna give up, I wanna give in But I don’t wanna die, I just don’t wanna live
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online Feb 13, 2017 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie— available here
Photographic Malady by Melodie Yvonne
The length of three songs. It’s like a heartbeat in time, but it passes in slow motion. The band charges onto the stage, and begins to gain speed as my eyes dart back and forth inside my eye piece. Time crawls slowly like a train holding up traffic, but in the end it was really not even close to long enough to drink in the scene and digest. There’s a whispering behind my eyes all the while as I work creating a rhythm to my madness. It engulfs my mind and body until I succumb. Shoot, edit, repeat. Shoot, edit, repeat.
Shoot. Edit. Repeat.
It’s a kind of preternatural chanting that hangs heavy, and smears through the air painting a grin across my face. The incantation rises up to the stage with the heat of my desire, and melts itself to the melodies pouring out to the crowd.
I take my eyes outta the lens, and set them back in the real world. I pray that I managed to capture at least one soul to later feed my addiction. I eclipse my face once again with my photographic guise, and scan the crowd with an insatiable hunger that overrides my fears. The three songs might be over, but the night is still young, and the crowd is particularly spirited tonight. Plenty of time. Plenty of room in my bottomless pit of a heart… Shoot, edit, repeat… Shoot, edit, repeat… Shoot. Addict. Repeat…
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online Feb 18, 2021 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie— available here
Ode to The Beginning of The End by Melodie Yvonne
Am I too far gone to make it, too late to be saved? Will I ever feel what stable’s like? All these places that I run just tryin’ to escape Detroit, the coast, New York’s the same alike
This acrid doom it follows me most everywhere I go And I’m just lookin’ for a friendly hand How much further I can go is anybody’s guess I’m tryin’ and doin’ the fucking best I can
I heard salvation‘s hidin’ in the eye of this here storm But my red eyes are swallowed up by hate This cruel ass world has swallowed almost everything I love And I’m about to self disintegrate
I’m trying to go for one last Savior, one last fucking dream One last motherfucking piece of pie And if this time this shit don’t work and I just can’t get out I hope at least that I can fucking die
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online March 15, 2017 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie— available here
Stumbling Up The Mountain by Melodie Yvonne
I find it amazing how some people can affect us in such fundamental ways in the blink of an eye, while others can be in our lives our entire existence like that of a sturdy mountainside that blocks your view of the sun, but can never quite keep you from growing.
I met a boy. One of the most beautiful boys I’ve ever met… And I didn’t know it. Later I found out why I couldn’t see how wonderful he was. It was because I realized looking at him was like looking at a reflection of myself, and at that time I just didn’t like myself that much. By the time I realized I had fallen it was too late, and I left him at the top of the hill while I ran away, stumbling back to that mountain for cover.
It’s hard to tell how long I’ll be able to stay here in its shadow. I’m like the Trans Am that you buy for fun, but you really just can’t get up those mountain roads without that Toyota 4Runner, and that’s something I’m never going to be.
So it’s funny how some people can affect you so much. Some people stay in our lives for decades, and then some are so much more… Some can change the entire structure of your being in a two-hour car ride, and nothing will ever be the same.
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online Feb 18, 2021 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie— available here
Cold Concrete Cage by Melodie Yvonne
Sittin’ here listenin’ to industrial crickets Folks walkin’ ‘round like they’re lost on a mission And I never wanted to be stuck here this way But here I sit, here I live, here I just stay
Factory made melodies lull us to sleep And anti-emotion pills hide what we keep But what I keep doesn’t need hid every day But here I sit, here I live, here I just stay
And again I hear humming of industrial crickets Lost souls all around me just gettin’ their fixes Use and repeat at least twice a day To get through this shift in the least feeling way
Top level merchandise buys out our souls And we keep right on grindin’ just tryin’ to fill holes Subconscious bribery “does us a favor” And we just sit numbly wishing for a Savior
I just keep prayin’ for God to set me free I can’t do this again, why won’t He just kill me? I’m tryin’ to be good, but it feels so alone Don’t make me live in this cold concrete home
It’s past twenty years now, and I’m still here grindin’ Don’t even think no more just obey blindly Fuck. My life’s gone now, and soon it’s my soul This industrial nightmare is swallowing me whole
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online Feb 18, 2021 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie— available here
Old Town Shuffle by Melodie Yvonne
Everything’s real quiet as we sit in the car We’re a little down the road, but not very far How long this’ll take really nobody knows Right now a pin drop’d make canyon echoes
Then all of the sudden Ike jumps in the car screamin’ “Drive! Motherfucking drive! It’s the motherfucking law!” “What the fuck?!?! I can’t go! What about Susie?!?!“ “They done got her ass! Now we gotta move, babe!”
We lurch on the road, headlights slicin’ the dark I point the car north, gonna slide by our mark It’s 20 and windin’ on 7 through old town I slink through real slow tryin’ to see what the fuck’s down
I snake ‘round the curve, red and blue lights the sky I’m paranoid as fuck ‘cause I’m guilty and high Just a matter of time ‘fore those pigs come and get me ‘Cause I’m that dumb bitches number one enemy
But wouldn’t you know, I got me some luck I guess it’s a good thing that whore likes to suck She’s been spreading those beef curtains all around town And I guess there’s a line to take that dumb bitch down
So I done got there late and didn’t take a number And I mighta set fire to that skanky ass dumpster But even the cops thought that bitch was pathetic And everyone ‘round town was taken the credit
Well, what could I do besides let ‘em all have it? I been there and done that, survival takes practice And the only thing better than gettin’ revenge Is stayin’ squeaky fuckin’ clean in the end
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
Originally published online Feb 18, 2021 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie— available here
Just Another Night aka Hey! I Hung Out With You At That House On State Street by Melodie Yvonne
I’m the only one that’s sober once again tonight I just want a bit of quiet, not another fight ‘Cause all this shit just gets real old every fucking day I’d take my baby girl and leave, but ‘cause of her I’m stayin’
I’m tryin’ to whitewash all the bullshit stained onto these walls If I don’t hold my shit together we’re all gonna fall But everywhere I go it seems I’m just a piece of meat Don’t wanna stay, but got no place to go if I could even leave
It’s just another night of takin’ care of drunks I guess It’s just another night that my whole life‘s a fucking mess It’s just another night that some dude knocks me to the floor While everybody in the room just watches and giggles for more
“Teddy, you don’t wanna do this. ‘Member I’m your friend.“ I know I gotta stay calm, but this fucker’s got me pinned “Teddy, please don’t do this, buddy, please just let me go.” Fuck, I know I gotta stay calm, but this shit is gettin’ old
I’m beggin’ and I’m pleadin’ and I’m tryin’ to talk him down But he just says he loves me as he grinds into the ground The laughin‘s gettin’ louder and it echoes all around Why the fuck is no one helpin’ me? I try to block the sounds
“Teddy, please don’t do this, buddy, please just let me go.“ He’s really not a bad guy, but that vodka’s got his soul “Teddy, please, you’re scaring me.” Fuck, now I’m gonna cry Oh wait! That tears got his attention there’s some life back in his eyes
He shakes his head and slowly blinks and then he blinks again Oh good! I think he’s comin’ to, I think this bullshit’s gonna end He loosens up his grip and finally, slowly sets me free I get up, dust myself back off, and then I start to clean
I really just don’t wanna stay, but don’t know how to leave I put the table back, pick up the glass, and mend a sleeve It’s just another night that my whole life’s a fucking mess But you’re not supposed to walk away from family I guess
Copyright notice: All content on this site (music, words, photos, videos) is copyright Melodie Yvonne. Non-profit online sharing is allowed only if content is unaltered and credit is given. Commercial use or unauthorized alteration is prohibited. Questions? Contact Melodie HERE
