Poetry by Melodie Yvonne

Originally published online Feb 18, 2021 & in the collection I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To: A Hitchhiker’s Guide To My Galaxie — available here

⚠️ Explicit Content Warning
This poetry excerpt from I Do Heroin On The Train Line So You Don’t Have To contains serious subject matter relating to drugs and sexual assault

Just Another Night aka Hey! I Hung Out With You At That House On State Street by Melodie Yvonne

I’m the only one that’s sober once again tonight
I just want a bit of quiet, not another fight
‘Cause all this shit just gets real old every fucking day
I’d take my baby girl and leave, but ‘cause of her I’m stayin’

I’m tryin’ to whitewash all the bullshit stained onto these walls
If I don’t hold my shit together we’re all gonna fall
But everywhere I go it seems I’m just a piece of meat
Don’t wanna stay, but got no place to go if I could even leave

It’s just another night of takin’ care of drunks I guess
It’s just another night that my whole life‘s a fucking mess
It’s just another night that some dude knocks me to the floor
While everybody in the room just watches and giggles for more

“Teddy, you don’t wanna do this. ‘Member I’m your friend.“
I know I gotta stay calm, but this fucker’s got me pinned
“Teddy, please don’t do this, buddy, please just let me go.”
Fuck, I know I gotta stay calm, but this shit is gettin’ old

I’m beggin’ and I’m pleadin’ and I’m tryin’ to talk him down
But he just says he loves me as he grinds into the ground
The laughin‘s gettin’ louder and it echoes all around
Why the fuck is no one helpin’ me? I try to block the sounds

“Teddy, please don’t do this, buddy, please just let me go.“
He’s really not a bad guy, but that vodka’s got his soul
“Teddy, please, you’re scaring me.” Fuck, now I’m gonna cry
Oh wait! That tears got his attention there’s some life back in his eyes

He shakes his head and slowly blinks and then he blinks again
Oh good! I think he’s comin’ to, I think this bullshit’s gonna end
He loosens up his grip and finally, slowly sets me free
I get up, dust myself back off, and then I start to clean

I really just don’t wanna stay, but don’t know how to leave
I put the table back, pick up the glass, and mend a sleeve
It’s just another night that my whole life’s a fucking mess
But you’re not supposed to walk away from family I guess

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